Valentine’s Day has returned. A day filled with love, but also its counterpart: loneliness. Every year, the day usually plays out in two different ways: valuable time spent with a special somebody or avoiding any indication of what day it is, while endlessly scrolling through obligatory social media posts. Being a part of the latter category does not mean you should feel excluded from the holiday. There is someone most deserving of attention and care just a moment away: you!
The stigma around this romantic holiday shuts out anyone without a romantic partner. However, dating or not, loving yourself as an individual is healthy and will better prepare you for beneficial relationships, even just the platonic ones. Without love for yourself, the ability to maintain a loving relationship will be impossible and taxing due to the lack of priority and self-respect. Many forget that self-love and love for others are reliant on one another.
By human nature, we are prone to be blind to what makes us beautiful and relentlessly pick at our flaws. This is the result of inherent doubt in ourselves and the notion that we are undeserving of love. Recognizing this mindset is the first step to changing it. The task is most certainly demanding. However, taking the time to take back a hurtful remark you made against yourself will encourage a feeling of self-appreciation.
What we often lack appreciation for is our differences. Safety in numbers is resorted to when it comes to interests, looks, styles and much more. By instinct, it feels safer. But, how can you know before you even explore what is beyond?
Along with the ability to explore new possibilities, embracing your differences is the secret to loving yourself. Society is so quick to shame someone for dressing differently or not fitting the “cookie-cutter” standards, but what sets them apart is what makes them their own person. Without our so-called “flaws,” how could we find a romantic partner, let alone a best friend?
Today, peoples’ looks, personalities and self-worth are measured by their relationship status. This indicator of someone’s relevance fails to acknowledge the individual. Digging deeper into individuality, it is the basis for setting boundaries and standards. Understanding what is a match for you can ensure a relationship worthy of your affection and attention.
Firstly, it builds a foundation of truth. Shying away from your true self issues stress, and continuing to deny your full involvement in the relationship will prolong that unease. The basis of any healthy connection is that both you and your partner can be truthful with each other.
Regardless of whether you have a romantic relationship, personal growth and success are essential to pursue. Self-improvement is hard to initiate; you have to be open to change. Switching your hours scrolling on social media can be substituted for starting a workout routine or any other new habit. Satisfy the interests that you have not yet pursued. Let go of the societal standards that are preventing you from enjoying your time which is all too precious. And, especially, let go of your fear of discomfort.
Societal pressure to have a romantic partner on this particular holiday is bound to get the best of many. Giving in can rush unnecessary stress when you may not be ready yet. Logically, the festivities last only one day; therefore, a rushed relationship is not worth the stress. Instead, opt for a day of pampering yourself. You deserve the attention and love just as any person does. Take the opportunity to improve your skincare routine or try a new hairstyle you have been wanting to test out.
Knowing loneliness may creep in, there is also the prospect of celebrating it with someone you already love. From a family member to a best friend, sharing the day with a platonic love will surely fulfill the lack thereof.
